What is this world coming to? I realize that kids will be kids, and I usually try to stay out of the mix and let things work themselves out. I am a strong believer in letting them try to work things out on their own without parental intervention as much as possible. Today though my sweet Lydia didn’t want me to put her hair in a ponytail because it would make her “look fatter”. I almost went through the roof. My knee jerk reaction was to pop that kid in the mouth and tell him his mom is fat, actually I won’t tell you my first thought, because if you thought that was bad you’ll really judge me for where my brain went towards a first grader. Of course, my sweet girl was appalled at my suggestion because “that would make me a bully Mom” Ugh. How is this already a thing in FIRST GRADE.
I am also not one to blame the parents for everything because Lord knows my kids are not perfect even though I am doing my best. But I’m sorry this one falls on them. Why would that thought even cross some kids mind to say to someone? Especially considering there is not an ounce of truth to it! (Not that that would make it okay either, but Lydia went through a phase last summer where she was calling people fat, myself included, and we had to explain to her that that was hurtful. She didn’t realize and was just calling things as she saw them.) Literally spit out of his mouth like a weapon just to be hateful. Parents, it is your job to teach your children. God knows they give you plenty of teachable moments and opportunities. Do your job! With three little girls at home it terrifies me how young these blows to their confidence and damaging body images start.
And I won’t apologize for giving her the okay to get physical. Ever since she was in daycare my rules of escalation have been the same.
- Tell the kid to knock it off, you don’t want your kid to be “that kid” that runs to the teacher or adult for every little thing.
- If it continues, tell a teacher or adult.
- If the teacher or adult intervenes and it continues, you’re allowed to handle it yourself.
Sorry not sorry. And this goes for if you see a kid treating someone else poorly too. Especially someone who is smaller, weaker or different. And of course, her siblings. I know this is a controversial subject but I feel strongly that I’d rather have my kid suspended for sticking up for herself or someone else than have her hold that stuff inside and suffer quietly as the victim.
What do you guys think? What stuff have you guys had to deal with and how did you handle it?